Republican Hate Fest
A lot has been made of the star-studded fund-raising gala in NYC a couple weeks ago, where washed up funny woman Whoopi Goldberg made an unfortunate joke involving our President's name and slang for a vagina. (I'm sorry--I've never been a fan of Whoopi's; I'm grateful to her for pushing boundaries, but she really isn't that funny.) I say unfortunate because the Right Wing Noise Machine decided to focus on that to push the view that the Democratic party is truly out-of-the-mainstream and is just a bunch of angry playa-haters.

And then along comes Ann Coulter, full of sweetness and light, a twinkle in her eye, and a match ready to toss in a bucket of gasoline. USA Today contracted her to write commentary about the Democratic convention (with Michael Moore handling the Repbulican convention), but after reading her first submission, they decided to say goodbye to Ann. Hmmm. That seems harsh. I'm sure it's partisan, but it's probably a funny read. Human Events, one of Ann's employers, has kindly reprinted this "lost" column, including notes from USA Today's editors. Let's take a look at the opening:

Here at the Spawn of Satan convention in Boston, conservatives are deploying a series of covert signals to identify one another, much like gay men do. My allies are the ones wearing crosses or American flags. The people sporting shirts emblazoned with the "F-word" are my opponents. Also, as always, the pretty girls and cops are on my side, most of them barely able to conceal their eye-rolling.

[...]

As for the pretty girls, I can only guess that it’s because liberal boys never try to make a move on you without the UN Security Council's approval. Plus, it’s no fun riding around in those dinky little hybrid cars. My pretty-girl allies stick out like a sore thumb amongst the corn-fed, no make-up, natural fiber, no-bra needing, sandal-wearing, hirsute, somewhat fragrant hippie chick pie wagons they call "women" at the Democratic National Convention.


Wow, USA Today just doesn't know funny.